People are bloggin'...
bloggin' 'bout people....
Look! My friend Hilarie let me be the guest blogger on her site! It's a really riveting and interesting interview where I talk about how awkward my dog is just a little too much and you can read it here! 
That was fun. I wish people wanted to ask me questions about myself more often. It is literally one of my favorite topics. 

So, anyway, How have you been? 
I've been good. 
I finished up Insanity and yesterday was my first week of Asylum and Shaun T ... he kind of got mean. 
Not mean. But ya know... he says he's giving you a 30 second break and then he's like "ya know what. I might say 30 seconds and it ends up being 10 seconds. DEAL WITH IT" 
... and it hurts my feelings when you lie to me like that, Shaun T. 

Two of the videos are like Insanity on crack (with equipment) and the other two are strength type training with resistance and strength bands and/or dumbells which I like. I really like the strength ones. 
... I feel like I'm missing the old workouts a little too much to give a fair review. I'll let you know in another week or so

Since starting Insanity- it's been a long time since I went to an actual class. It's so much easier/ more convenient/ requires less pants to just do the workouts at home.
And also, I had decided that since I had completed freakin' Insanity that this would be a great confidence booster because obviously I'd be on a whole other level than those other suckers and grandma's in any given class.

So, I chose this class called Body Attack. It is a Les Mills class which is affiliated with Beachbody, so I thought this would be a great opportunity to learn about some of the product and also show off my mad skills. 
HEY! GUESS WHAT SKILLS I HAVE? I'M REALLY GOOD AT GETTING SWEAT IN MY EYES AND BEING OUT OF BREATH. 
Oh. My. GAWD, Becky. This was one tough cardio class to keep up with! 
I mean I can't say I didn't get a good workout. I think I burned just shy of 500 calories in the hour, but there were times that I was like "why did I do this?!". 

Something I've taken for granted in home workouts is that there aren't other people there which is really great because sometimes people are the worst. 

First, by that I mean it's really hard to let yourself take a break- even if you think you might need it- there's that ego there. I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing. I mean, it certainly motivates you to keep going. What do you think?
But also- UGH, PEOPLE. Amirite? I just longed for my laptop and DVD's and no other people around who don't hear simple instructions because they are talking to their friend and then get in the way of someone else's workout! 
But the instructor was FANTASTIC all be it- cheesey as gooddamn hell. He reminded me of that guy from Office Space with all the flair. 
He was the nicest, most energetic, and essentially the flair guy from Office Space of group fitness classes. 

His energy was great, but at certain points he was so cheesy that I felt sorry for him. Do you know what I mean? It was just... a little much. 
But I would probably do the class again if I was in a FUCKING CARDIO YOUR BRAINS OUT mood anytime soon. 

I got the honor of meeting a bunch of other Beachbody coaches in the area at the Austin area Super Saturday this weekend. I also got to sample PiYo which I am SO FUCKING stoked to get on. I'm going to do after Asylum and would love to do a challenge group with a group of people on it. Please, please let me know if you want to try it with me. You're going to love it, I promise 

I drink Shakeology because I love the taste. I'm also really picky about the protein shakes I drink, but this stuff I wouldn't even call a protein shake- tho it does have 15 grams of protein per serving (in the vegan recipe at least). The reason I'm so picky about protein powders is that so many of them have so much utter shit in them and shakeology ingredients are all like quinoa, pea powder, stevia, flax seed, spirulina, spinach, etc... Like- stuff I know. And no soy-- which is a grey area for so many. 
At Super Saturday, a woman spoke who has Crohn's disease, but since she's started replacing one meal a day (on a 5 meal a day plan)- she's pretty much symptom free. Now that is freaking impressive to me. I mean losing weight is fine, but I believe so much in the healing powers of eating the right FOODS for you body and I love that she was able to quit some of her medications all from getting in the good shit in Shake-o! 
Here, I think this guy gives 

And I personally love it because omfgyouguysitsogood. The vegan chocolate mixed with a banana is best. Very yum. So delish. Many nourishments. Wow. 

So.. yeah. That's kind of what's been going on the last couple of weeks in regards to health and fitness. Other Things: 

• I'm still not drinking coffee. I'm still having headaches so that's supposed to stop eventually- right? Or do I just have headaches from now on?
  
• SPORTS! In particular: THE WORLD CUP. We went out to watch the US/Portugal game and it was the most stressful experience of my life. 
• No more Game of Thrones til March. So... what am I supposed to annoy people with by obsessively talking about now?

So anyway- I'll leave you with some pictures and shit that I posted throughout this last week. 

When I was fourteen years old I got my first job at my aunt's coffee shop- which I'm pretty sure is super illegal because I was 14, paid below minnimum wage and under the table BUT- I learned a lot.

1) all your broke ass 14 year old friends are super jealous when you got all dem Washington and Lincholns to flash around
2) the importance of responsibility, blah blah blah blah
3) OMG COFFEE IS AWESOME. ALL OF IT. I LOVE IT.

Seriously. I love coffee so hard. I like drip coffee black. I like double espressos I loove iced coffee. I like to save the coffee from the day before in the fridge and make protein shakes with it.
I. love. COFFEE Y'ALL  

Anyway, sometimes at my job I have really, really boring and mundane tasks like stuffing envelopes or sorting mail so to keep my brain from turning to mush and oozing out my ears- I find informative videos on you tube to keep my brain sharp (also,a lot of videos of dogs)
Recently, I've found Brenda from Lean Secrets YouTube channel and can we say girl crush? She's fantastic.
Here's some more links for her
Here's one
Here's another

So, I watched the video below giving ten reasons to give up coffee. So, I'm thinking "Okay, well if this one little habit could be standing in between me and a flat belly, then I can totally give it up. You don't really get addicted to coffee"

Go ahead and watch it now. It's pretty damn convincing.

So, with a happy face forward I was like "I'm going to do this!" and somehow convinced about four people on Facebook to join me in a 10 day challenge.
Currently on day three and I just want to say UUUUUUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUGHHG!
UUUUHHHHGGG!
UGH!

...shit.

I can certainly see some changes in my back! I really wish I could see these kind of changes in my belly (lol, you may notice I didn't do a front picture like I said I would today here, but I'm a grown woman and I do what I want) (actually, it's both that 1) that same outfit is dirty and I feel like when comparing you should be in the same clothes and 2) okay, I just really don't feel like it)

So, these are the kinds of results you can expect while doing Insanity, so I'm pretty excited to track the results with Insanity, The Asylum that we start Monday (though the name is a little daunting)

The mere fact that this picture is an official Beachbody picture makes me nervous.

And Steve is going to do it with me again this time. Maybe I can convince him to do some before and after pictures. Maybe if I get enough pressure from the people in the comment section below

There is a brand new program that came out Friday called PiYo. It has been super anticipated for months now and Beachbody surprised us and released it a week early! I've already had one friend purchase it and I cannot wait to see her results.

I'm actually kind of jealous. I kind of wish I was doing this one next, but I wouldn't have gotten it in time to work along side with my Challenge Group that starts Monday and it really means a lot to me to be working hard and starting the same timeline they did. SO! I'll get this next.
60 days of Insanity + 30 Days of Asylum + 60 days of PiYo= sexy, sexy beast.

OH! and PiYo is on $20 off for a challenge pack if you want to get in on that shit in June or July.

OKAY!

I skipped a workout yesterday. 
I mean, I didn't have a workout scheduled that day. It was Sunday and on the Insanity schedule, that is the rest day, but I usually use it as my run day. I like to run once a week (I use the term "run" very, very loosely), but yesterday my TV was all like, 
"say girl. say, girl. how 'bout you just sit yo little self down on that fine ass couch?"
And I was all like 
"YOU'RE A GODDAMN GENIUS". (and then did not question my ability to communicate with inanimate objects) 

But, here's the unexpected thing. 
My workout this morning. 
I kind of murdered it. Like, straight up. I don't get super sore from workouts like I used to (tho, I don't think you ever totally stop getting sore), but today I felt refreshed and was able to take on the moves I have problems with a little better than I did last time which I wasn't expecting. 

I might have to give this "rest" thing a second thought.. 

Whatcha do this weekend? I got in some shoppin'. I did some good eatin' (and a little clean eating cheatin'), prepped my meals, and relaxed a bit. 
So let's talk about the food!

As I mentioned, Austin is a super vegan friendly city to live in. New places with  vegan portions of their menus- or exclusively vegan menus- are popping up all the time. I had heard about Unity Kitchen through an Austin vegan message board I like to creep on. So, we gave it a shot and we LOVED it! 

I got the taco salad and Steve got the lasagna and they were deeeelicious. Thanks, Leslie! 
(Leslie is the owner.)
(I'm not just thanking random people)
(or this Leslie) (RIP) 

We also visited Sweet Ritual, which is kind of staple in the vegan community in Austin. Non-vegans like it too because ohmyfuckinggoditsthebestthingever. 
Go look at their menu. Go ahead, I'll wait. 
Right? Looks fantastic, doesn't it?! I had the peanut buttercup flavor with chocolate sauce, but Steve went H.A.M. with his sundae. I almost went back for seconds, but luckily that voice inside my head who is a rational person was all like 
"bitch, you'll barf! You just had a taco salad 20 minutes ago"
Which was solid advice because once we left and the seconds craving was gone, I realized I was totally full and would have been miserable with another serving 
But if anyone wants to go back
....gimme a call. 

Yeah, this blog isn't only about what I eat and how I work out. I also like really intellectual shit. Like shopping, celebrity gossip and TV, okay??
Friday, I went to some resale shop up north and it was fine, but kind of boring, but I did find one dress that I freakin' fell in love with on the hanger and was so disapointed when I put it on and it was too big (and let's face it. I am too damn lazy to go get it altered) 

Isn't she lovely? I debated for seriously like 10 minutes in the fitting room what to do, but ultimately decided it just didn't fit very well and if it was meant to be we would find each other again. In this life or the next. 

I did end up getting the top I'm wearing in the date night picture up above and some earrings for only $14 total. So. Not a total loss. 

Then, on Sunday- while not working out, I went to this new resale shop on South Lamar called Uptown Cheapskate. First of all, I love the name. I feel that it speaks to me.
 

Secondly, I totally racked out. I had a budget of $45 and I got 2 dresses (Target & Charlotte Russe), one top (Old Navy) and one skirt (Express) for $42... and that's including tax, so yeah. I was pretty pleased with that trip. 

But, then something awkward happened because, hi, my name is Katy and of course it did. 
I saw that yellow dress!!! The one from above. I saw it at Uptown Cheapskate. I went to examine it to see if it was the exact same thing and maybe in a smaller size. It didn't have a tag in it and looked as if it had some alterations done to it, but it looked my size and I went to try it on

Y'all. I got fucking stuck in the dress. Yeah. Whoever had done alterations to it must have tried to crappily reinforce the zipper and it tore while I was zipping it up. Then the zipper wouldn't go up. It wouldn't go down. I had the damn thing around my waist and I started to panic and get sweaty because claustrophobia in a fitting room is a thing that happens to the socially awkward.  And it's real

The ladies had to freaking cut me out of the dress. Like she had to bring scissors into the dressing room and cut out the zipper and part of the seam so that we could get my sweaty ass out of this beautiful, but cheaply made dress. 
I mean, they were super nice about it, but still. Only me. So, I've let the dream of this dress go... for now (until I find it again and it like gives me chicken pox or something) 

I just wanted to give a shout out to my old college buddy, Rachel for being like my number one fan on the Awkward Burpees Facebook Page. For her awesomeness I sent her one of the prestigious sweatbands that we got at work from some random-ass vendor and I just wanted to take some time to show her some love (and ask you to go like my Facebook page if you haven't already)

I am hosting- along with my fellow Beachbody Coaches- a challenge group and I am SO DAMN EXCITED. 
Basically, what a Challenge Group is is that you- the health minded consumer- purchases one of the many fine Beachbody fitness programs
Then you join our Facebook group- starting the 23rd. There we give you all the support you could possibly need to get through your challenge and it is the BESTEST. We exchange recipes and words of encouragement and do challenges and post funny quotes and inspirational message and  Oh, boy. I don't care if it sounds cheesy, but I am genuinely excited to hear from our participants and lead them in group challenges. I want to learn what they like, what they hate, what they struggle with and what programs fit which kinds of workout preferences. 

If you would like to participate with us there is still a week left to order your challenge pack or fitness program (however you roll) so that it makes it in in time for the start of the group. So far I've got:

• My girl Shana doing the 21 Day fix. Shana is a friend from college who is looking for a more structured meal plan system and I just know she is going to kick all the ass with this program because she's a BAMF
• Hilarie, my very best friend from childhood, will be doing T25. Hilarie is basically a Beachbody veteran (she did Insanity while she was pregnant and if that doesn't warrant respect, man I don't know what does) and I'm so excited for the input she may have to first timers. And omg, here's her blog go read it now. 
• Katey, who I recently reconnected with, will be doing Insanity and might be jumping on the Shakeology train. Katey is a mother of 4 (FOUR!) and I'm super excited she's getting back into it. 
• Maci, my beautiful tropical fish friend (Just like Anne Perkins!) from college who will be doing T25 and I'm sure kicking ass at it! 

So... yeah...
It'd be lovely if you  joined us! 

I remember when I was younger and older people would say "can you believe it's already June... time flies" 
I'd always feel like they were so freaking slow. Because, yes. I can believe it's June because I have a calendar and last month was May and that's just how days work, grandma. 


....but, guys
.... Can you believe it's already June? The years halfway through. Where does the time go?

ANYWAY, this weekend was pretty good for health and fitness for the most part. I was feeling reluctant to get up and train insane (ugh! I'm so sorry) on Saturday, but Steve and I convinced each other to Dig Deeper (I will quit talking Shaun T one day...?) and got up and did the Max Plyo video. It was real y'all! 

Also, a vendor at work sent our company a shitload of these cheesy ass sweat bands and it's the best thing that ever happened to me

I think I've mentioned before that I sweat more than anyone else you've ever met in your life ever, and I hadn't broke down and bought a sweatband yet because they're so stupid looking

But, y'all. Sometimes it's miserable. I have to keep stopping because my sweat is just blinding me by pouring in my eyes. (Also, I'm having to stop because I'm doing Insanity at 5 am and fuuuuuck)
So, just like they PROMISED in The Secret, I sent sweatbands out into the Universe, and the Universe responded accordingly (I mean, the Universe could have given me one of these cute ones or something that they make now, but whatever. Whatever!)

Currently sending the Universe certified-pre-owned-nearly-new-car vibes. 

So, Sundays have become meal prep day in the Hearne-Church-Monster household. As part of my Beachbody Coach training I'm helping run a free clean eating group on Facebook. I even got to write the Vegan Meal plan for the group which was really fun! Like I am way more excited about our group's progress and am having way more fun and probably getting way too emotionally invested in this, but that's FINE! 
So, yesterday I made the following: 

1. 6 servings of this Quinoa Soup
2. 2 baked sweet potatoes that I plan to steam veggies over and smother in clean eating approved salsa
3. 3 side salads
4. 6 servings of these awesome Cake Batter Protein Bars (seriously, check out that website Pretty Fit Mom. It's the blog of one of the coaches running my internship group and she's a beast)

Yeah, it took me forever, but now I don't have to worry about planning or cooking pretty much all week. BAM! mothafucka! 

Oh! And guess what! My goal for last week was to have 50 likes on the Awkward Burpees Facebook page by the end of the week and I had 70 by last Friday!!  YAY! So, now if you're reading this and you haven't liked it, please do so because I ain't too proud to beg. Sweet darlin'. 
My next goal is to have 100 by this Friday. Currently at 79, so ... tell your friends! 
...or don't? 
I'm suddenly uncomfortable with how pushy I just go. Which is going to make this next bit just uncomfortable for everyone....

Shaun T has two challenge packs on sale this month! Insanity (#soulmateworkout) and his Hip Hop abs. What are challenge packs? When you order a challenge pack the price includes: Shakeololgy, a month of Beachbody club membership and the program you're ordering. So, if you've thought about doing Insanitiy or the more Zumba-y (for abs) Hip Hop abs, this would be a good time for you because it's on saaaaale, bitches (I really shouldn't call potential customers bitches, should I? I think that's generally frowned up in the sales community) 

Sales pitch status: complete. 
Anyway! 
Umm... man, I've forgotten how to end these things gracefully. 
How about with sweatbands?
That seems... like... something