Hey, oh! Hi, there. Well, hello. 
Come here often?
No? No. You probably don't because I haven't posted in like a year or something. 
Damnit, Hearne. Get your head in the GD game. 

Anyway. It's been a long time... Shouldn'ta left you. 
(without a dope beat to step to)
(step to) 
(#aaliyah) (#timbaland) 
(#hashtag)

Aaah! I'm already off topic. 
What I'm trying to say is that I'm back to fill the void that I left when I quit writing and fell off the face of the world. 
So, what's new?
Umm.. well; 

• I part my hair down the middle now and grew out my bangs. So, that's pretty big news. 
  
• Oh! Kim and Kanye got married and Jay Z and Beyonce did NOT attend. So, that's a pretty huge scandal that is totally relevant to my life and this blog. 
  
• I switched jobs. So, I very rarely now contemplate faking my death, letting my parents collect the life insurance and living out the rest of my life in a gypsy caravan. So, yeah. 
  

But besides that everything's still the same. Living in love with my  boyfriend and and my city and my spazzy ass dog who hides in the closet from the dishwasher. 

Oh! I know! 
 So, about three months ago I took my tax refund and made a pretty big commitment. I met, who I like to call, "the other man in my life" 
(no one ever laughs at that, but I'm going to keep saying it) 

Yup! I train Insane (I'm sorry)
I am halfway through my second round of the Insanity program and Y'ALL IT IS ADDICTING*. 
Now, I wouldn't say that my experience has been like those on the infomercials or on the website, but I have some small things I've noticed. A muscle I didn't use to have here, a pop of muscle there, and a lot more strength and endurance with every other work out I might take on. 
*okay, when I say it's addicting, I mean if you like having your ass handed to you by a work out. I am- for all intensive purposes***- dead by the end of the workout
***I know, guys

And that's okay. It's okay that I've had a different experience than other people. Dude, seriously. Don't compare yourself to other people. Bodies are different. We work... differently! And that's okay! One of the worst things you can do for your mental state while training is constantly comparing yourself to other people. 
I think. That's what I think. Then again I am not a psychiatrist nor a naturally competitive person (except with ping pong for whatever reason), so WTF do I know? That's just what I believe. 

ANYWAY- the Insanity pack says you should track your progress with pictures and measurements and never the scale, but I just really wasn't at a place where I felt much like tracking. Just doing. Which- again- is fine! Until one day.... 

I was in a fitting room where you have the mirrors in front of me and behind me. So I could see a full view of my back. On a whim I flexed my back muscles and OHMYGOD WHERE DID THOSE BACK MUSCLES COME FROM?! 
I am so proud of myself! I've always been insecure about my back (I realize that sounds weird) And then I decided I did want to start tracking some. So, here are some pictures from last week. I'll post again at the end of month 2 (which I started yesterday)

So, I became a BeachBody Coach. As of like... 48 hours ago. I'm very new. But here are the facts: Beachbody products are legit y'all. This isn't some get skinny quick shit. P90X, Insanity, The Les Mills programs. These don't mess around. And I get my shit at a discount. I am so super stoked about this endeavor in my life. 

So, here's just a little bit of shameless self promotions and then I'm gonna give you a slide show of some stuff you missed while I wasn't blogging: 

Wanna buy some BeachBody Stuff?  
OMG Y'ALL THIS BLOG HAS A FACEBOOK NOW GO LIKE IT IMMEDIATELY (My goal was to have 50 likes by Friday. I've already got 43. 7 of you just go click "like" okayplease?) 

I have a question for you guys. A "How Would You Feel" kind of situation. Much like "What Would You Do With John Quinones" (or as Steve says "What Would you Do with the Jolly Mexican")
So, I was in Sheri's 5:30 pm RPM class yesterday. Getting used to this bad boy:

A group of 4 women walk into the class, all in various appearance of shape. Editor's note: I feel like I need to point out that I don't feel that BMI has very little to do with actual health. I've had plenty of yoga teachers who appeared overweight but still totally kicked my ass. People who aren't thin run marathons every day & there are super trim people that can't walk up a set of stairs without getting winded. 
One of the women in the group was quite overweight & one of her friends announced to the teacher (& subsequently to the class) that she was really sore from yesterday's work out & that she was a beginner by all accounts of everything. Sheri came over & showed the newbie how to adjust her bike & get things going. 

When the class is finished, the lights come back on & I wait in line to get the goods to wipe down my bike.

SIDE NOTE: can we talk about how those motion censored towel dispensers are the fucking worst & they never know I'm there & then you just look like an idiot waving at a machine?! This is the most frustrating reoccurring first world problem in my life. 

While waiting & then approaching the contraption that I've come to abhor (the bike. I'm just talking about the bike) I hear Sheri approach the newbie & in no discreet voice praise her for getting up & coming to the class. 
Sheri went on to tell the newbie how proud she was & encouraged her to let any of the staff here at the gym know if she needs motivation or had any questions, etc..
"You did a great job" she said
"I was really impressed by your drive" she said
"You are going to love your new life" she said. 
"I am so excited for you. You're opening a new chapter in your life" she said... something like that (I'm paraphrasing. I didn't catch it word for word as I was waving at an inanimate object & praying to the gods of paper towels to please grant me the gift of sanitation) 

Either way. I left the classroom feeling uncomfortable for the newbie. I mean, she wasn't showing any visible signs of annoyance & I do not at all doubt Sheri's genuine excitement for this woman, but I just know if it was me I would have been pretty embarrassed. Like, in the first place I would have threw my friend some mad shade for announcing my newbie status to the whole damn class. Secondly, I can only imagine how self-conscious I would have felt having my out of shape-ness pointed out to everyone by a professional. 

IDK. I really.. I really just DK how I would have felt I guess. 
Am I being over empathetic in a situation that does not merit it in this situation? I mean because there were plenty of people in the class that obviously come to the class all the time & really worked their asses off & they didn't get praised after the fact. 

I'm probably just an asshole & she was just trying to be nice. But anyway... 
   

I started a tumblr & I literally have no idea what I'm doing. 

Basically I just post pictures like this little gem to the left. 

So, please. Follow me on tumblr... or what ever it is that you do on tumblr... tumble? Come tumble with me 

This weekend wasn't necessarily perfect for health & fitness, but it certainly wasn't the worse & definitely a step up from last weekend. 
BUT it was a fun weekend! 

Friday started off at Beyond Fit. I had the day off so I got to go to a morning class- which I highly prefer. It was my first real work out all week. I knew I needed an ass kicking, but I wasn't expecting this: 

In case you can't read that board (which I thought: "well, I must be misreading this" upon my initial view) It went like this: 
Warm up was pretty tame. Some squats & chest presses. But the body of the work out was... well it was fucking retarded guys. 

* 30 pull ups started us out. & No. I can not to pull ups unassisted (and really haven't tried since like.. the 3rd grade?) So, we had those big ass rubber bands around my feet. The first eh... 18 were a breeze. And that was the only breezy part of the next 35 minutes. 

* Kettle Bell 1 legged dead lift. 30 on each side. So, basically this exercise may as well be called "hey- you weren't planning to walk up or down stairs at all for the next week, were you? Oh. Sucks to be you bitch". (but I don't think that would have fit on the board)
*Decline push ups. 60. 60 fucking push ups. Okaybye. 
* Sandbag clean spuat, overhead press & slam. Ok, so this is kind of hard to explain in writing but it involves taking a 20 lb sand bag & using your whole body to slam it on the ground & also you include a squat in there. 60 of these bad boys. About half way through I kind of just had to take a walk around the gym & regroup because IT WAS REALLY REALLY FUCKING HARD.  
* Cross body mountain climbers. 60 (30 on ea side) I really, really hate these because I always feel like it's squeezing the part of my body that controls the barf. And- it hasn't happened yet- but I bet it would be really embarrassing to barf in front of a bunch of people. 
* 30 more rubber band pull ups. My shoulders & arms were goddamn jelly at this point. I was doing them 3 at a time, so this took me like... like just way too long. 
Yeah, this whole thing took about 35 minutes & then after this we do 10 minutes of some steady workout like jump roping or jogging. I did the rowing machine. And then I struggled to climb in my car & got my ass home

So, the rest of Friday was pretty chill. I actually had Saturday off! I was pretty stoked to sleep in (yeah, 8:30 for me is like seriously sleeping in). I did manage to make it to the gym that morning. I did a 35ish minute cycle sequence. Fuck, y'all. Why is it so hard? I made a pretty great playlist & promised myself I could stop when the 7 songs (35ish min) was over. 

And that is the last I want to talk about exercising! Unless we're talking about exercising our rights to have a fantastic Saturday (why did I say that? I'm sorry).

Around noon Steve & I made our way down to the Laguna Gloria Museum. It was adorable. Except for this little guy: 

Isn't this just the cutest? The grounds were beautiful, the house was adorable, the little old lady that did the tour was cute. It was only $5 & right next to it is a park with a shitload of peacocks (how many time in your life will you get to say "shitload of peacocks?). It's certainly worth making your way over to this part of town on a pretty day. And hey! Then I found this handsome guy just wondering around: 

So, moving on. 
That night we had made plans to go to a two-stepping lesson & I'm not going to lie. I was NOT excited. 
Last time we did this we went to The Broken Spoke for Steve's birthday (I'm not going to link to their page because I don't want anyone knowing I'm saying not great things about them because in my mind everyone comes & reads this page because I'm really really delusional) 
Look. Somehow I'm the only native Texan that didn't grow up doing the two-step & as a result I'm real real bad at two-stepping. But! I thought "great! We'll take lessons & I'll learn to two-step & I totally won't leave this bar full of rage & pent up embarrassment." (this is called foreshadowing) 
 So, we paid for our lessons & I told the teacher that we were new to this. The teacher was sort of a prissy super Southern lady with way over done Miss Me jeans & one of those face microphones. 
Long story short: I couldn't get it & she made fun of me & kind of yelled in her face microphone in front of everyone in the class. 
And then our waitress disappeared for most of the night & reappeared & offered me a Red Bull from the trunk of her car. So- I was underwhelmed to say the least (tho after I got drunk I'm 90% sure I tried to do the Safety Dance to the live country band. So, I win in the end)

So- yeah. I was apprehensive to say the least about trying the lessons at The White Horse. But, I put on my (vegan) cowboy boots (effin love Madden Girl) & tried to do my hair as big & Southern as I could. 

Fast forward, we make it to the White Horse- over on the east side & we walk in & I kind of immediately fell in love with this place. It was so old school & worn down & everyone acted like they knew each other & they were handing out goddamn birthday cake to every customer. 
Oh! & then I go to order drinks & it was only $7 for two cocktails (I don't know if vodka soda is a "cocktail", but anyway) 
Finally, the dance lessons started & it was actually really fun & not at all intimidating & I didn't get yelled at! Not even once!

So, basically we stayed there a few more hours because the atmosphere was killer, the people were nice, the instructors were awesome & the drinks were so so cheap y'all. And hey.... that handsome guy from the museum showed up: 

After that we stopped and got Thai food because I don't know how to say no to Thai food. I didn't get the Pad Thai which is always the wrong move. Ugh. I mean it was fine, but it could have been so much more. 

Oh! And then we had an awesome experience at the bus stop. If you're not going to read anything else I ever post on this blog- please at least read the following!!!!!
Um.. So, backstory. I don't think I've ever mentioned on here because most of you probably know me & Steve. But if you're new (welcome! I like you!) something you should know to make this make more sense: my boyfriend is a foreigner. In the words of Paul Rudd from "Forgetting Sarah Marshall"... he sounds like he's from London

So, at the bus stop some homeless looking woman strikes up a conversation with Steve. I really wasn't paying attention (because I bought M&M's ok? I was in M&M world & I'm not proud of it) but I think they were talking about the royal family- who Steve really isn't a fan of & she asked him if he was excited about the Royal Baby (is that right? Is that what we call it?) & I chimed in 
"It feels like Kate Middleton has been pregnant for years!". 

And, honestly, all I meant by that was that to me it feels like the Royal Bun has been in that oven for approximately 3 years. Like- the media has been on it for much longer than 9 months- ya know? 
But Homeless Looking Lady took this as ... an insult? So here's how that exchange went 

Homeless Looking Lady: So, are you excited about the Royal Baby?
Steve: No, I kind of don't really care
Me: It feels like Kate Middleton has been pregnant for years! 
Homeless Looking Lady: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?! MY FAMILY HAS BEEN WORKING FOR THEM FOR GENERATIONS. THE MCDOUGLES HAVE BEEN LOYAL SUBJECTS OF THE ROYAL FAMILY FOR YEARS AND WE DON'T NEED THIS SHIT FROM YOU. SO YOU BETTER PICK IT UP YOU STUPID SLUT!!!!

And then she stormed off. And I don't have a photo of what my face looked like at that moment, but I'm gonna take a picture now & show you what I bet my face looked like after this transaction: 

And then another homeless lady changed shirts- and bras- right by the bus stop. 
So, basically what I'm getting at is that downtown Austin is a magical, magical place. 
Happy Sunday, everyone! 

Last weekend was & this week was recovery from my sister's bridal shower & boy oh boy did fatty get carried away! 
Bu I mean really. Let me show you something: 

Tell me you aren't salavating at the adorableness of this. 
You can't. 
You just. You just can't. 

I have a really bad habbit of getting carried away every time I go home. It's just something about being home that brings out the drunk David Hasselhoff eating cheeseburgers on the floor out of me. I don't know man. 
I just don't know. 

However, in preperation of Hasselhoffing (what I am now calling extreme drunk munchies), our family friend Jill took me to spin with her the day of the shower. Let me tell you something: 

IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. 

Unlike my gym here in Austin, this gym had a million fucking fans in the cycling room. Oh my god how that makes a damn difference. Seriously. 
And also- I kind of loved the instructor. She played nothing but 80's music. Which- to tell you the truth- was kind of hit & miss, but I loved the thought & energy that she brought to the table. 

Also, can we just talk about how it's really for the best that they turn the lights down in spin class? I mean. Gross. No one at all wants to see that, guys. 

I cannot for the life of me remember this instructors name, but if you're in the SETX area & get a chance to go to a cycling class at the Exogyn in Nederland- give it a shot y'all. And if worse comes to it, just pretend you're upping the gears. No one will ever know the difference. 

So, this playlist was pretty interesting. She started with Dead or Alive's "Spin Me Round"... because it's a spin class!!!! Get it? Seriously- get it?!!? It's a spin class... spin is in the title of the song?!

Whoa. 
Y'all. 
I have never watched that video in it's entirety before. What... what a special experience I just had. I literally said out loud (to no one because I am home alone): "Why is he a pirate now?" and "Oh, good! Flags!"

And then I Googled what that guy looks like now because I thought how funny it must be for him to look back and go "dude. What the fuck was I wearing".... but somehow I doubt that's what's going through his head now. I won't waste anymore time on this (Because I seriously want to go make a fan page now), but I do encourage you to look it up. 

Ok. I MUST move on now. 
What was I talking about? Oh- the rest of the play list! Actually right after the class I sent myself a note-to-self about how I felt about the playlist. Wanna read it? Here it goes: 

"-You spin me right round baby right round. It's a spin class right round right round
- "Dude Looks Like A Lady" was a weird choice
  - Oddly enough, "Don't Stop Believing" did nothing for me. I think that's one of those songs that only a incredibly drunk person can truly love
  - "Sweet Child of Mine" was a bad choice. 
  - Must. Add. Heart's. "Barracuda" to. Running. List. Pronto. "

I kind of can't get this song out of my head now. Hey! Wanna see what me & Jill looked like after spin (and then immediately see a much more flattering shot of us because I'm so vain I probably think this blog is about me)

Then, after the shower my BFF 4E & E & E Nicole & her fiance came over & my step-dad made steaks (and portabello mushrooms for the princess) (btw: I'm the princess). The rest of the evening had a lot a lot a lot of booze & dogs & "name that tune". 

... This was Saturday. 
... I got my voice back Wednesday. 
For some reason I made everyone white Russians. I think I made my very underage brother drink white Russians with me at 4 am. 
Everything gets a little blurry after that. 

So- yeah! Good weekend. REALLY FREAKING GLAD I don't have my scale anymore though! 

I will leave you with some more pictures from that weekend. (lots of selfies, I'm realizing)

Yesterday morning, I had the overwhelming desire to weigh myself. And, if you would kindly reference my previous post, I no longer have a scale (threw that bitch in the garbage!) so... it was kind of like withdraws for my morning disappointment? 

I was... less than perfect on the 4th and I feel like I'm carrying a little extra.. umm.. "fluff" right now. So, it was refreshing to not feel obligated to give myself some momentum (sadness?)

So, then I got up & got my ass to the gym. My Monday morning work out was a 30 minute elliptical workout on the interval setting. 
Then followed by 15 minutes of an upper body circuit strength training & can we talk about gym hair real quick? 

A quick Google search of gym hairdo's would lead one to believe that it is at all possible to have cute hair while working out. 

I tried to do something like this side french braid for a yoga class, but I was sweating so much that it looked so effing gross. Also, when you're laying on your back that pony tail is awkward & uncomfortable that I just ended up taking it down & doing a top bun-type thing. 

Oh. My God. Pigtails get so damn sweaty. It's freaking gross. Like one time I was doing mountain climbers & sweat was dripping OFF OF MY PIGTAILS onto the mat. 

I mean, it was just gross. 

But one time I had the braided tails like this pictures at a boot camp & when jumping rope the braids kept hitting my shoulder and sweat was just a-popping off everywhere & it was gross & uncomfortable so I had to stop in the middle of the workout to put my hair in a top bun-type thing. 

Ok, have you ever tried to work out with your hair down? Fucking retarded. Doesn't make any damn sense. It's uncomfortable & hot & if you're anything like me you're a gross sweating mess within the first 5 minutes & your hair is sticking to the back of your neck. 

Ok, let's talk about other things. 
I don't really know if what's moving & a-shaking up at the Texas capital is big news everywhere else, but yesterday- I partook in some politics. 
Now, this is not a political blog, but SB1 is an important bill & which way it goes (yay or nay) is very, very important to me. 
If you have no fucking idea what SB1 is about you can educate yourself further here, here, or kill hours on twitter with #swtw
Also, check this shit out: 

I now realize that I'm kind of making a "derp"-y face (for a lack of a better term) in this picture to the left, but don't I look cute when exercising my democratic muscles? 

Also, I've never owned anything burnt orange (somehow I've lived in ATX for 4 years & managed to never go UT nutty) & had to borrow this dress from a friend- Thanks Ashley! 

It was excitingly boring. I stood in line for about 3 hours to cast my ballot. You could register with a ballot for or in opposition of the bill. You could also register to testify in written or spoken form. After casting my opinon I went around & watched the masses. Some had sings. Some had pamphlets & words. 

There. were. a lot. of feelings. 
I'll leave you with some images from this whole ordeal. Some I took myself. Some I did not. Enjoy: 

This morning, against my better judgement, I decided to step on the scale. I've really started to put Kimberly Snyder's Beauty Detox into action & I got a badass work out yesterday & thought the results would make my day. 

So, I stepped on & it said 125. Hmm, not bad. Not the best, but I cheated a bit this weekend. 
Then I stepped off & it said "Error". 
Hmm... okay. 
So, I stepped back on & it said 128 & that just doesn't seem right. 
SO, I stepped back off & stepped back on & it said 73 pounds. 

& that's when I threw that bitch in the garbage

I never know if the scale is going to put in a good, bad or sadness cake mood. Sometimes it triggers a binge- which is suuucky. Sometimes- I'll have a "good" weigh in & then think "oh, I deserve a treat" & end up going overboard. 
So, no more. None. NO! 
(I mean, I do plan on buying another scale eventually. Preferably with body fat % measurement capabilities, but for the time being.. Imma enjoy not having this asshole tell me how to feel every morning)

And ya know what? 
The title of this post has got an old song in my head that lead me to a-Pinterest-ing & I now have a very serious question: 

What the fuck was going on in the 90's?
I don't even.. I don't even know what... I mean, what is that? What is glowing? Are those reflectors? Are they worried about crossing the street at night at the 1999 Billboards awards while wearing all black leather so they were like 

"hey, let's throw some mother fuckin' reflectors on that bitch. It'll be dope. Safety is the bomb" (or whatever we were saying in 1999)

Aaaanyway- here's a quick question: do you ever have the super strong since that you are about to just absolutely barf all over the place mid workout? Is that just me? Is that a thing with normal people?
Because that was kind of the internal theme of my work out at Beyond last night. I say kind of the internal theme, because I finally made it an external concern. 
While doing stomach churning V-ups I asked Chad 
"Have you ever had anyone barf while doing this workout?"

He responded with a chuckle that led me to believe he wasn't quite understanding the severity of the situation. 
Ya know, it's so much worse the later I get into the day. If only I could always make it  to work out at 5:30 am, but sometimes bed is better. 

Here's a picture Chad snapped while I was all unsuspectin' & posted it in the Beyond Fit Facebook member's page. The caption he posted was something along the lines of "Way to push through, Katy", which is funny because this workout was supposed to be in plank position & this is me making my way to standing up because I thought for sure I was about to pass out & die or throw up or both. 

The workout was pretty intense-- is what I'm saying. But once I was done I get a high five & big celebratory shout of "you didn't throw up!"
& now I feel like this should be some fitness brand's new logo. 

Alright, everyone! Enjoy your 4th of July, errbody! I'll be spending mine with some British guy- hopefully poolside or doing something outdoorsey. Either way, I'm sure I'll keep you posted! 


Bye, bye, bye, y'all! 

This weekend wasn't the best for healthy eating, but it also certainly wasn't the worst ever. Certainly wasn't the worst. 
BUT today is another day & I woke up this morning with a healthy mind frame & headed to the gym 

I really, really wanted to get in a good hour long cardio jam, but it had been raining that morning & it's Austin in nearly-July so it was hot & muggy as a mothafucka outside, so going for a run was totally, totally, just totally out. & frankly, the idea of hopping on a machine for an hour straight sounded fucking boring. 

SO! I created a great cardio-based circuit that I will now share with you (you're so welcome.)

I started on the rowing machine & did 10 minutes here. Beyond Fit often uses rowing machines in their workouts, so I'm starting to get a little more comfortable with this contraption. I swear the first handful of times I tried one these machines I kept getting my damn feet awkwardly stuck in the ...foot.. things (whaddya call those?) 
It wasn't until Chad at Beyond was just like "Yeah, you just push the strap thing down like this" that I realized how user friendly this machine actually is. 
Last circuit I went to at Beyond they encouraged us to try to row 200 watts which is HILARIOUS because when I am just going with all my might I rarely get above 130 watts. 

After 10 mintues there, I did an abreviated version of the obliques blaster workout: 

• 10 burpees
• 15 Left sided V-ups
• 20 Russian twists (total, not on each side. Because I don't hate myself)
• 15 Right sided V-ups
• 12 (on each leg) walking lunges with 5 lb weights (I know, not obliques, but I was feeling crazy)

Next, I moved onto the next cardio set, which I thought was going to be the stair stepper, but I don't know if I'm stupid or if those machines are stupid, but I just... couldn't... do it right (?) So, instead I did the stationary bike. No, not the lounging one, but the tall one that's like the ones in spin class. 

Fuck. fuckmylife, y'all. This certainly was the most challenging part of the workout. I couldn't do the whole 10 minutes on a difficult incline so I did a intervals consisting of 90 seconds steady pace/ 30 second "what the fuck is wrong with me" pace (why is that not already a setting on this bike?). Back & forth for 10 minutes. 

Y'all. I was such a gross sweaty mess on my next round of the burpees & v-ups, etc... I left a huge puddle on the mat where I was laying. 
...And I wonder why I never make friends at the gym.

The next block was 10 minutes on the elliptical. I did a pretty steady interval. This was certainly the easiest part of the whole time at the gym. After this I finished the last round of the oblique blaster (plus lunges) & called it a day at a 50 minute work out! It was challenging & I feel like I really got a good cardio in without getting bored! 

As I've mentioned, I'm reading Kimberly Snyder's "The Beauty Detox Solution". I'm not super far into it yet. Basically the first half of the book is about the basic gist of her suggested way of eating. Explaining why this food is good & why this food is good to eat in this order & which foods don't go well together & which foods digest best eaten in which order. 
And then the second half of the book discusses how to put that into action. She keeps talking about her Glowing Green Smoothie & clients of hers that have changed nothing except adding one or two of these a day to their diet & the benefits of it. So, bitch -I had to skip a head a little & get the recipe. 
In mine I've been using spinach, arugula (ATTENTION: I'VE DISCOVERED I LOVE ARUGULA), cilantro, lemon, whatever fruit I have around (usually green apple or banana) & cucumber. Zap it in the blender & I like it way more than I expected to. 
It's a great way to tide yourself over until a next meal & also it's a freakin fantastic way to get tons of fiber & energy boosting vitamins. If nothing else, I'm hooked on this as a middle morning/late afternoon snack. 

And every time I drink it I sing "So fresh & so green, green!" (like the outkast song) because I'm really, really white (like, so white)

Oh, before I go- I want to leave you with this image. 

The ladies at BeauCooo posted this on their Twitter. I don't like totally get what the BeauCoo website is all about, but you should absolutely be following them on Twitter. Constantly posting tons of body positive stuff (and also just self positive) & make me smile on the damn-daily. 

So, what this says to me is that no one is going to make money off telling you how awesome you are & that is exactly why there are millions of self help books & no "Fine Just The Fucking Way You Are" books. 
So, I am here to tell you- that I may never make any money off this, but you are awesome. You are fucking fantastic & don't let some billboard or advertisement or the voice in your head tell you otherwise. 

You fucking foxy fox you. 

Let's talk about Mexican food real quick. 
There is something magical & wonderful yet horribly, horribly wrong about Mexican food. Now, I don't mean authentic Mexican food (which I'm sure is still horribly unhealthy, but hey! Authenticity has street cred). I'm talking about Tex Mex, of course. 
Of course I am. 
If you're from Texas- you know what I mean. There's something oddly comforting yet fucking bastardly about a big bowl of queso

Yesterday. Yesterday- I kind of showed Mexican food that "No. I am in control of this relationship, bitch"-- which is kind of huge! 

So, yesterday after work I made my way to BeyondFit & had my ass handed to me by Tricia. Y'all. I totally forgot my sports bra & almost didn't go to class as a result because, fuuuuck- boobs are the worst sometimes. Especially whilst doing jumping jacks. (Jack jumping?) But I went. I jumped the jacks. With ropes. I ran & rowed & lunged & sweated my ass off! 
So, it was a success. 

And then I got a text from Steve seeing if I wanted to go see a Mariachi band. Goddamnit, I love a good Mariachi band. Try to be in a bad mood while looking at this: 

You can't. You simply can't. It is the best good-mood-inducing music & visual one can have. 
Initially I said no because calories, calories. But then I thought of their little funny hats & silly little pants & how sometimes they'll go around & serenade some poor patron who is just trying to eat their chimichangas. And it's the best. It's just the best. So, I went. 

On an empty stomach. NOT SMART. 


Austin is a great city for vegetarians & healthy living so I just kind of assumed I could find something to eat, but Jalisco's had different plans. 
Y'all. Even ALL of their salads had beef on them. 

The only, only thing they had on the menu for me was the veggie fajitas. Which actually turned out fine. I got that with out the rice, pinto beans on the side, didn't use the tortillas or sour cream. Now, I'm sure they cook the veg in a shit load of butter or something, but given the circumstances- I think I did Okay, goddamnit! 

Then some guy at the bar sent us over a Margarita. I asked Steve if it'd be rude to return it for a glass of wine- which got little response. I felt way rude, so I took took about 3 good size sips & called it a day. 

So, basically I showed the chips & the queso & the fried things & the cold drinks that I control when I eat you- you don't make me eat you by just being around and smelling so fucking delicious.

BAM BITCHES.  

That's it. 
I'm throwing that damn scale out the window. 
It doesn't serve any purpose except for upsetting me & making me feel unhealthy (unless it's a rare occasion when it actually makes me feel good about myself. Which is kind of jacked too)

I found this funny thing & it made me feel a little better

Oh, you have no idea how strong my desire to walk down the street wearing only my Ray bans, birds-a-blazin' this morning. 
However, after stepping on my scale I took off my running shoes & got back in bed because I seriously just wanted to hide under my covers & never see the world again. 

Sigh. 

Sunday brunch. Sunday brunch is what did it. 

When I go somewhere that has healthy options, I like to sing the restaurant's praises for helping a gal stay fit. Moonshine Patio Bar & Grill is not that place. But, their brunch is legendary & my willpower was low so curiosity got the best of me.  
I'm sure I could have gone healthier, but when I pay for an all you can eat- I really feel like I should get my money's worth. 
Oh, did I not mention it was an all you can eat buffet? Have I also failed to mention before how I consider buffets a personal challenge? Because I really,really do. 
There was the good- deviled eggs, a light pasta salad, a fruit bowl, steamed greens
The not so bad- pesto cheesey eggs, roasted potatoes
Then there was dessert. 

"Our specialty is our bread pudding" Said the waitress. 
 "Whatthefuck is bread pudding" I asked myself. 
Oh, I found out. 
I found out exactly whatthefuck bread pudding was. Several times. 

Sigh. As I told Steve this morning, I need to quit screwing myself all up on the weekend. To which he nodded and said he loved me because there's really nothing anyone can say to me when I'm in a "I hate my body/ I hate myself" set of mind. So, I tried to refocus my energy on the here. The now. 
What I can do here. What I can do now to make myself the healthiest Katy I can be. 
I mean, what's the point of beating myself up for Sunday's brunch? (ugh! I mean, it wasn't even a freaking special occasion & I ate like it was my damn last meal)

So. I am trying things a little differently. I've started reading this book because I think maybe I need a reminder of why it's good to eat well- outside of the results I see on a scale. I've been following Kimberly Snyder on Pinterest for a while. I've glanced at the general idea of her book & dietary teachings. It's a primarily vegan meal plan- which is fine with me- that focuses on cleansing your body with the food you eat every day- not just after a huge splurge. I'm not very far in, but so far I'm finding intersting. And what I love most is that she says no scale & no calorie counting & I say "O-FUCKIN-KAY."


I'll let you know what I think when I get more into it. 
So, I think I really am going to push my weigh-ins to once a month because "uuuugh", ya know?

Before stepping on the scale this morning, I said to myself, "Self", I said: 
"Don't be disappointed. You were way healthy this week, so whatever that machine tells you does not define your worth. Also, you've been mega freaking bloated the last couple of days, so take that into account, Self". 

Also, I did strength training yesterday. Does anyone else notice that? If I do tons of cardio- the scale goes down the next day, but when I pick things up & put them down for an hour, the next day the scale goes up. Do muscles... like.. retain water or something after a hard work out? 
If someone could please look that up for me, that would be appreciated. 

Anyway, while 125 wasn't my ideal- I wasn't devastated or anything. I have been feeling sluggish this week. And you know what- I was 125 lbs the day I graduated high school. I'm sure there are plenty of people who would be thrilled to be the weight they were when they graduated high school ten years later. 

OK, so let's talk about something else now. Namely, a fitness studio called Beyond Fit. I've mentioned them a couple of times before.I had been waiting to write a "Spotlight On" until I'd gone more, but yesterday I was just so blown away by their customer service that I just have to show some love!

So, I am on my free trial here right now & have pretty much already decided that I am going to stay on after my first 10 classes (yeah, first 10 classes free! Plus- they do free boot camps like every other Sunday. Come with me, please. I'm so fucking awkward there by myself. If you can't come- at least bully Steve into going with me.)

So, last night I had signed up for the "Cardio Fit + Core Fit" class and when I got there the previous class was finishing up & as it turned out- I was the only one that had made it to that class! 
Oh, great. This is going to be really awkward-town, I thought. But it really, really wasn't! Chad, one of the coaches & owner was all like "are you okay going at it alone?". I totally gave him an out. I would not have been offended at all if he would have gone home early, but instead- I got my own class! 

Dude. Dude. No, seriously dude. What a freaking work out. I kind of thought I was going to barf after about the first 15 minutes,BUT I managed to keep my head in the damn game (though I am pretty sure I looked pretty pathetic. It's a lot easier to deal with looking pathetic when there are others in the class) 

The work out was a circuit. I love circuit workouts because of my small attention span. If I do something for too long I'll get really bored. Believe me, I was not bored with this one. There were 4 stations. Each station had two work outs. You did 10 of each workout & stayed at that station for 6 minutes. Do you follow? It doesn't really matter. I was a gross sweaty mess by minute 3 is really all you need to know. Like, sweat kept getting caught up in my eyelashes & making me wink & blink all weird. Does this mean I should start wearing sweatbands? (FASHION!!!!!!)

Hey! Here's a picture off their Facebook. This is from the last Sunday free event. See how everyone else is jumping onto the blocks & then there's that purple blurry blob having to step up one leg at a time? That's me! I'm the blurry purple blob. To be fair, I did try to jump, caught my foot on the edge of the box & fell on my hands at first (skills). So, midgets, you've been warned. Just step up so as not to scare the shit out of the people standing next to you. 

Anyway, yesterday's workout. The whole thing was crazy challenging, but I think the hardest part for me was the ropes. You know, when you hold a rope in each hand & flail your arms around like a nut? I've never hated those ropes so much as yesterday. When we got to this station & Chad very nonchalantly was like "Ok, so you're gonna do forty of these & then move onto the mats" I just assumed he was joking because I'm a sane person. 

"Forty?"
"Yeah, forty." He said all happy go lucky. 
Mother. Fucker. 

Can we just talk about how this was the worst experience of my life?
By the last round I was just... I just couldn't... it was just like... I just wanted to die, is what I'm getting at. 
But, somehow I managed to survive & tell the tale! I know, I deserve a goddamn medal from the government or something. 

So, yeah I'm sure I'll write more about Beyond fit in the future, but I just wanted to talk about how *special* they made me feel yesterday. 

This isn't about fitness, but it is about Austin- which is really what the other half of this blog is about. The city has declared tomorrow, June 22nd, the first annual Love your Rescue Pet Day!  Did you know that Austin is has been a no-kill city since 2011? 
As the parent of a rescue pet- I love living in a city that's so animal friendly. So, basically what I'm getting at is: GO ADOPT A DOG FROM APA OR THE HUMANE SOCIETY RIGHT NOW (STEVE). (How or why this post suddenly became all about making Steve do things he doesn't want to or isn't ready to, I'm not sure) (but seriously)

Adopting a rescue was both a great & frustrating experience. It wasn't easy, but oh man. I don't know what I'd do without him now. He's my baby. Here's a picture of him sitting on my butt, because that's what he does when he's nervous & at a new place (... and I happen to be laying on the floor.)

Some fun facts about my rescue dog:

• He has a Xanax prescription
• He is literally scared of shadows (if we're on a walk & a bird flies overhead & casts its shadow he PANICS)

Anyway, go out & get a foster dog to love tomorrow. You'll change a life. 
I once saw something that was like "I got a foster dog to save a life & it turned out he saved mine". Ok, that's not true with us, because as I mentioned- Teddy is afraid of shadows & could never save anyone BUT maybe your rescue will be that for you. 

I leave you with this video that Nicole posted on Facebook: