I go through cycles of loving to run & just really feeling like I can't be bothered.
So, this week it has cycled back into the "fuck yeah! I'm a goddamn baddass. I'm gonna run outside" mentality. 
Let me tell you something, those first couple of runs after 2 or 3 weeks of not running is fucking difficult. 

Unless I'm really in a pinch- I say a run is at least 30 minutes or 3 miles (lemme tell you, the 30 minutes always comes before the 3 miles, but it does good things for my mind to have options) but I always strive for longer. 
Tuesday was my first run in ages & I had just got a new phone & hadn't uploaded  my music yet, so I was solely relying on the kindness of iHeartRadio. I always feel like these streaming radio stations are so hit & miss, but luckily the Robyn radio station was killing it for a solid 20 minutes so that at least got me into the groove.

Ok, listen to "Cobrastyle" and tell me it doesn't make you want to move around. You can't. You just can't do it. (also, remember Robyn's early stuff from the 90's? Ha! I totally forgot she sang that "Show Me Love". I'm sure she would prefer everyone forget...Thanks, iHeartRadio!)

So, anyway. On Tuesday after the first mile- I was really, really ready to stop, but I powered through. I was super winded. It was a little embarrassing  Luckily, the sun wasn't really up yet so no one driving by could tell that I looked like I had already been running like 6 miles in the Sahara desert in midday. 
Seriously, I was so gross. It was... it was gross. 

Once the 28th minute came around I told myself "Goddamnit, Hearne. You can go another 5 or 10 minutes. You can do anything for another 5 or 10 minutes" BUT -by what I am convinced is divine intervention- it started raining! 

In case you don't know: it doesn't really rain in Austin.. and also it was only sprinkling, but I took it as a sign from the powers that be that I had done enough for that morning & spent the last two minutes jogging home.

And then I ran again this morning & it was a little easier. I am always so sore all over my everywhere after a first in a long time run.

Anyway, as I mentioned: I got a new phone! Which means downloading all my apps again & uploading music & replacing contacts, etc... 
It also means fun new features. Like this distortion on my camera: 

Which brings me to an app questions. 
Don't worry: it's still about running because I know you guys are all dying to talk about my running routine more & more. 
Do you use any fitness apps that you just can't live without- specifically a running tracker with distance & pace tracked on it? I've been using Jog Tracker for ages. There's not really much to it & it just does what it's supposed to. My only gripe with it is the calorie counter is weird & I think inaccurate. (but I'm starting to shy away from calorie obsessing, so not a huge deal) For instance, this morning I ran for my 30 minutes & looked at the calorie count & it was approximately 230ish. 
So, then I switched to walking for the last leg of my walk & at the end of my journey it said 170ish calories... which... I mean... 
What?


Now, I've just downloaded MapMyRun. I haven't had a chance to use it yet so I don't know at the moment if I'm going to prefer it, but it looks like you can map out runs & see what others in the area are running- which seems neat. 
What do you use?


HEY! HERE'S MY NEW FAVORITE RUNNING SONG

It's fun, right? Isn't it fun? I think it's fun. 

As you may have noticed, I did not weigh in this week. 
And if you did not notice & you are a first time visitor, Hi! I'm Katy &  I didn't weigh in on Friday. 

In my ongoing crusade for body positivity (a concept that, sadly, just dawned on me like last week) stepping on a scale after the previous week did not seem like something nice to do to myself. 
While I am still maintaining my goals, still striving for that last goddamn 8 pounds to disappear, I think I need a little more analytical- nicer- approach to it sometimes. 

You think- "yes! Step on that damn scale. If you're not at a loss from last week it will be motivation to do better, goddamnit. I will do all the squaaaats"
& sometimes that is the result. 

But sometimes the result is "oh. I didn't lose any weight this week. I need some sadness cake" 

So, please allow me to tell you why I didn't weigh in this week in list form:

• white wine
• 2 cupcakes
• ice cream
• red wine
• half of a Nutella doughnut (fuuuuuck)
• Frozen mojitos 
• portobello alfredo (also, fuuuuuck. There has to be a healthy-ish version of this. I will find it & I will make the FUCK out of it) 
• vodka
• cheesecake. 
• I think that's it, but there was a lot of alcohol in there, so I can't be 100% certain
• oh, shit. I just remembered pizza

So, yeah. I've been kind of a food slut this week. Look! There's a cake for that one too! 

So, let me esplain myself, Lucy. 

Last weekend was my sister's bachelorette weekend. 
I feel that maybe that doesn't require any additional detail into the indulgence, but it was great. One thing that was great, is that we spent some serious time at the pool & I wasn't self conscious & looking for an escape method the entire time. I was able to have fun. This is huge for me. 
All of my sister's friends are really hot. So, for longer than I'd care to admit I have been worried about lounging amongst her & her bikini clad crew, but it was fine. Just having a new outlook on things is SO FUCKING LIBERATING (if I haven't mentioned enough)

It's like, look. I eat healthy most of the time. I exercise plenty. I'm strong & healthy & so if my body doesn't look like someone else's--- it's just not meant to. And I'm doing OK. 
OK?! 

That's us! Me & my beautiful seeester at the beautiful W pool where drinks are $15 & the security is on par with the goddamn White House. I bought a new swim suit from Target. This is me kind of fitting into a top from a department store, but my cup very nearly runneth over. ALSO! I cut bangs. Look at my bangs! 

And THEN on Thursday, my baby sister got a big deal award from the governor's office for being a badass. 
Or.. something about grades & community service. IDK, but we're super proud of her. Only like 5 kids out of the entire state receive this honor each year. Luckily, the ceremony was in Austin so I didn't have to travel (score!)
So, they had a luncheon for the families, so it pretty much would have been rude to turn down the delicious meal they provided (tho I did show some will power & split the cheese cake with my brother. 20 year old boys have all the metabolism).  

There's Kelli with her award & smart people money (I'm being told it's called a scholarship). Ain't she pretty? And there's me trying not to be in the picture & all kinds of failing. And that other person is my first ex-step mom because my family is confusing. 

BUT even though it wasn't a great week for healthy eating, I did manage to get the following workouts in: 

• super long elliptical work out
• average length-ed elliptical work out
• arm day
• Holy hell leg day
• Daaaaaance party with my sister (though someone brought pizza to the club, so that kind of negates all the dancing I got in)
• Strength training at Beyond Fit where I learned: surprise! I have been doing deadlifts pretty damn wrong. So- education! 

But now I've got a few weeks with no big events coming up, so head is in the game & that game is healthy eating. I'm looking to try some new recipes & classes in this upcoming week. 
Also, here's my new favorite site EVER! 

I'll leave you with some Thug Kitchen wisdom: 

I cannot stand this effing commercial. 
Cannot stand it. 
Can. Not. 
And the only thing that even made me notice it is when the one woman goes "I feel healthy" (notice how she totally avoids eye contact with the camera whilst making this claim...). 
Out loud- to no one- I said "Bullshit" & set to the internet to look up the ingredients to this product. & as I suspected: 
Bullshit called, muthafukas! This is far from a health food & if it makes you feel healthy, bitch get thee to a treadmill. 

And it makes me so mad that a huge company can throw the ingredient greek yogurt on something & play it off as a wholesome food. 

There is an obesity epidemic people! 
Though I will 100% agree that it is the consumer's responsibility to know what they are consuming- my amazement is at no end when I realize what some people believe to be healthy for them due to media outlets such as this damn commercial. 
Like, remember the lady that sued Nutella because her kids got fat?
No, Nutella should not have been advertised as a health food when the first ingredient listed it sugar (btw, if you don't, know ingredient are listed on the label starting with the ingredient they use the most). 

But then again, the parents should be reading the labels & not feeding their children anything if the first fucking ingredient is sugar.

I mean, just read the goddamn ingredients. For instance, at my job I am always getting junk food from vendors & realtors- that I then hand off to the nearest person that will take them (sometimes I get scratch off lottery tickets & I'd much prefer that, y'all. FYI). Then this conversation happened between me & a junk-bringer (who we'll call Sam. What a fun anonymous name)

Sam: So, I know you're a vegetarian (with a basket full of candy in arm)
Me: Yeah. (shit, please don't ask me why. Editor's note: no vegetarian wants to talk to you about they became a vegetarian. I just tell people I'm allergic now)
Sam: So... are you a vegan?
Me: Nope, just vegetarian. 
Sam: OK! So you'eat cookies?
Me: Um.. I mean, unless it's a special occasion or a much needed cheat day, no not--
Sam: So, no junk. 
Me: No junk. 
Sam: No junk at work. 
Me: don't touch the stuff. 
Sam: Got it. 

SO, today she brought me... this shit. And I totally don't expect them to bring me anything so it was nice of her to go out of her way & get something "healthy", but dude. The first ingredient on this bar is Corn Syrup. 

"Only 80 calories!" she said- omg-so-super-stoked-like! 

What I wanted to say was "ya know, I'm sure a tampon doesn't have many calories either, but would you eat that?" 
Of course, that's not what I said. 
But seriously, y'all. It's so sad that the average consumer thinks if "fit" or "wholesome" or "real" etc... is on the package that it MUST be healthy. 

So, back to the aforementioned healthy-feeling-making cereal. Let's examine the ingredients there. 

OK, so you can go here to read the ingredients & the nutritional info. But here's the basic gist: 

• The first ingredient is "Whole Grain Flakes". Ok, seems like a legit start. But then come the parenthesis to list the ingredients to the ingredient (bad sign) which second & fourth ingredient are are "sugar" & "corn syrup". 
  
• The Greek yogurt in questions? "Greek Yogurt Powder" is listed & then the parenthesis (never a good sign in ingredients!) it says "heat treated after culturing". WTF does that mean? What it means is that it is heated & then looses all it's probiotics which is like one of the main health benefits of Greek yogurt. 
• So, while we're on the subject of benefits of Greek yogurt- let's look at the protein. 5 grams? Seriously? Ya know how many grams of protein are found in a single serving of plain, fat free Greek yogurt? Up to 22g! Duuuude! In fact, let's look at an Oikos plain fat free Greek yogurt label

Seriously. Both the yogurt & cereal have a 1 cup serving size. Okay, this cereal has 230 calories per serving, 47 carbs (certainly not all complex either. look at all the damn processed sugar), & 13 grams of sugar. Also, an ingredient list that goes for days. One of the very first things I ever learned about nutrition is: if you can't pronounce it, you shouldn't eat it & if it has more than 3-5 ingredients: it's junk food. Also, if "sugar" is listed as an ingredient: it's junk (brown sugar is not better. cane sugar is no better. These are processed, simple sugars). So, let's see how many times "sugar" is listed on the side of the Honey Bunches box...
SIX TIMES! 
And yes, yogurt is processed, but no where near as much as like... all the breakfast cereals you see in on the shelves of H.E.B. And there are some delicious healthy recipes including fat free greek yogurt. Here's a few! 


Steve often for breakfast has a serving of Greek yogurt, raisins & all natural peanut butter. 
I love, love, love to do a packet or two of stevia & all natural peanut butter with a banana. Oh, dude. It's the fucking best. 
Also, if I'm having it for breakfast & just want something a little more carby: I'll make some quick oats (only ingredient: oats.), bake some apple (or pear) in the oven for a minute & throw it all in a bowl with some cinamon & Greek yogurt. It's AAAAAWESOME. 


Ok,so the moral of the story is: don't believe what's advertised. I know it sounds like a no brainer, but don't let the advertisements tell you what's healthy because they are lying.
Do. your. homework. y'all. 

Have you ever left a fitness class? 
Like just straight up walked out?
Rude. Really effing rude, right?

....I did on Thursday. 

... and then I saw that teacher at the gym this morning & - just like when I was dodging out of her class- I tried like crazy to avoid eye contact. 

So, on Thursday, I got to skip out of work a little early. I decided to check the schedule at my gym to see if there were any new classes that sounded fun & was just damn thrilled at the description of their "Body Jam". Advertising a booty-shaking good time & the promise to "get high on the feeling of dance" (no, not even making that up. Says that on the class description).

I did learn something new: if you're not sure how you're going to feel about a class- don't stand freakin' front & center. Get to the corner. Close to the door. Maybe do the warm up in the doorway. Couldn't hurt. 

I could tell pretty early on that this class wasn't for me. The music just wasn't my thing. It felt like .... like "Night at the Roxbury" music 

As I've mentioned (many times) before, if the music isn't moving me it's really hard for me to get into a cardio class. 

As much as I appreciate a good playlist in a yoga or boot camp class- it's not quite as necessary since you have something to focus on besides finding a groove.

But in a dance class, that's kind of the only thing you have to get you into it, ya know? 
And now, I'm not saying anything bad about the class or the instructor. There were a lot of ladies that were really fucking into it. I mean, like really. The instructor- Boni, I believe her name is- obviously had a following. There were plenty of women in this class of different ages & fitness levels that knew every step & really felt the groove of heavy bass 90's jams. I just wasn't on the bandwagon. 

So, after roughly 20 minutes of trying to get into it- they started to incorporate some mambos. 
I JUST CAN'T MAMBO, OKAY?! 
I just... I just can't do it. 
Sometimes if I'm just really into it I can find that groove. 
& sometimes if I really want to be into it I'll just do a step ball change move (and look really white, y'all), but this is not a move that comes naturally to me. So, I don't know why- but that was it. 

The thought that I'd be enjoying myself so much more on the elliptical wrapped up in the world that is my own finely crafted playlist crept into my head. Visions of Maclemore & Girl Talk & Ke$ha danced through my head. 
Yeah- whatever. I said Ke$ha (I hate the damn dollar sign. Why does she WANT to make me be so embarrassed to like working out to her?) I woulda been all like "FUCK YEA!" if Ke$ha ($ugh$) had come on. But... it didn't. & I needed to get home & walk the dog at the end of this hour & just decided, fuck it (eloquent, huh?)

Ya know, this is my time. I need to feel like I got a good workout. It doesn't mean this is a bad class, but I would just be getting more out of it on a solo adventure to the cardio jungle (what I am now calling that area of the gym that has all the ellipticals & treadmills). 

So, I just kind of took a few steps to the back of the class by my keys & water bottle. Took a few sips of my water. 
I looked up & yeah, she was looking right at me. 

how do I do this? How do I do this? Why... why did I get in the middle of the goddamn dance floor? Damnit, Hearne. Just. Just go. Head down. Eyes to the floor. Just go. 


And that's what I did. 

And then this morning. This morning I was really feeling the circuits I had created. And it was one of those days where I was so bummed I had to go get ready for work because I totally could have stayed at the gym for way longer than the hour I got. 
And there she was. Boni. & I know she saw- & recognized me. 
So, I just looked at my shoes. Feeling like a total bitchface. 

The thing is- the strength training exercises her &  her friend were doing looked really challenging & cool & part of me wanted to go be like "hey! Sorry, I hated your body jam class, but can I do this stuff with you? Also, 'body jam'. What a cheesy ass name, amirite?"


But, of course I didn't. So, what do you think? Should I have stuck with the class out of courtesy or is my time my time? Am I officially on someone else's time once that horrible music starts playing? 

I'm a nice person. I swear(ish. I swear-ish)! 

oh, my god. Why don't I effing touch up my toes before I take these pictures? Ugh! 
But anyway. I'm all in all pretty pleased today! It's annoying that the number on the scale isn't budging, but it's so encouraging that I've lost a half inch off my waist in the last month! 
And I mean- scales are so fickle. It's the measurements & the way your clothes are fitting that are the right way to track your progress anyway. 

I'm actually considering knocking my weigh ins down to once a month as it is a bit of a stress & I'm on a whole body positive kick right now & scales are kind of dicks sometimes, ya know? 

Can we talk about these Michelle Obamas real quick? (If you're new- I call nice lady arms Michelle Obamas, because she is my bicep role model) 
I was considering gong to yoga today, but the mere thought of it hurts. 
On Wednesday I went to an X FIT class at Beyond Fit. The X FIT class is described as a "High Interval Training Depletion". 


So, like let me set up the flow of this class for you. First, you start out on the TRX chords. (Christ, I love the TRX training. I'm honestly trying to figure out where I could set some up in my apartment. No where. They would fit nowhere is the answer my apartment is giving me) .
 So, we do a low row on the TRX chords for 45 seconds. Then you have a 15 second transition into the next work out. There are 4 workouts- all challenging- done in 45 second increments & you do the circuit 6 times & by the time you get to the last round you. are. depleted. 
And though it was a total body workout- my poor little arms are in pain. I mean, I like feeling sore because I like knowing that my I'm getting stronger, but.. but. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh. 
Like, it sucks just to raise my arms above my head. So, the thought of doing planks or crow or any other arm strengthening yoga stance sounds like holy good god hell right now. 

So, I may just try spin again today. 

So, let's talk about my weekend. It's my sister's bachelorette party this weekend & I'm sure it's going to be a blast, but I am getting worried about my self control. 
I keep telling myself that I can have fun & still make smart decisions, but as I've mentioned before.....

Steve has told me just to not worry & have fun, but when I don't worry & just let my drunk munchies run unattended... well... (see above)
If things just get too out of control, I may try to do some sort of cleanse next week. Just to get my damn head back in the game. 

So, anyway... I don't know how to end this now. 
So, I'll do this

Stop. Stop. Stop what  you're doing. Just... put it down & look at me. 
Look. Look. Are you looking?
I just needed to tell you that you are fucking beautiful. Okay? 
No, no arguing. Beautiful. Fucking retardedly beautiful & I won't hear a  word against it- ok? 
Good, I'm glad that's settled. 

Let's talk about your body image real quick. My body image real quick. 
(warning: Real Talk)

Today I had to remind myself that just because I don't like my body doesn't mean I don't like myself. 
And then I had to tell myself that I needed to quit telling myself that I don't like my body. Because when I tell myself I don't like my body then I subconsciously tell myself that I don't like myself and then it's a vicious cycle that continues forever & that's just no way to live! 

Look, if your thighs touch right now.. they will probably always touch forever. & That's... okay. It has taken me 28 years to get this in my head & ya know what- it's damn liberating! This is how I am designed and all I can do is make it the healthiest it can be. 

My thighs are part of my legs. My legs help me do all the things I love (awkwardly, but I don't think that's their fault) like running & zumba & yoga & prancersising (hasn't gotten old yet)  & so for that - I need to quit criticizing.  
goddamnit. 

Ok, so I want to share a site I found with you guys when I decided to write a body positive post. At first I thought I would just put up some unrealistic "fitspo" images that are allllll over Pinterst and make some sarcastic crack about it (see above), but then I found this website: Beauty Redefined & I just got so inspired.
Seriously, if for nothing else- visit this site for the Photoshop Phonies section. It's... it's just really amazing that we- even on a totally subconscious level sometimes- are beating ourselves up for not looking like the people in the magazines who in real life look like normal people! PEOPLE! C'mon

But seriously. The whole site is just one big, compiled source of "you're okay. You're fucking beautiful". I believe the site's creators even have billboards of the above (very top) throughout the state of Utah. It's very much against body shaming (of all types because that can often effect the naturally very thin too) & how media is profiting out of screwing with our minds. 

I found this particular quote really thought provoking 
" This sinister lie that female worth is dependent upon appearance is incredibly successful," 
So, what they're at is that there are many outlets profiting from us stuck in the rut of "don't like my body, don't like myself" because then we go out & buy oh, I don't fucking know... shakeweights? 

So, I guess my thesis of this whole post is: you're beautiful. 
Of course, take care of yourself. Make healthy choices.
Or not! What the hell do I know. 
Except you are beautiful. I'm gonna end this with a real quick look at some photoshop of horror material! 

My weigh in this morning was super-duper frustrating since I thought I had eaten spotless 95% of the time this last week & worked pretty hard. So I expected a bigger loss since last weeks (Last week- 124.6. This week- 124.2. But I did paint my toenails for you. SO, you're welcome)  

I have like NO time to write, but I really wanted to continue with my Friday weigh ins. My measurements are the same. I'm going to cut back my carbs again, I think until I get down until 122 & then try to reintroduce complex carbs like yams, quinoa & all natural (steel cut) oatmeal. Last time I cut carbs drastically for the week, it helped a bit. 
So, to say goodbye I had a BIG ol' bowl of oatmeal & baked apples for breakfast this morning. 

ok, since I'm very limited in clock space, I don't have the time that this glorious creature, Joanna Rohrback, deserves (she is the person, not the horse in the picture above). 

I cannot. cannot. cannot quit watching her brilliant exercise video & I am in awe of her & I am so super for real this time when I say she is my spirit animal. 

I have now watched this video like 10 times. Thank you, universe, for introducing me to Prancercise: 

It's time to cut the noose & really let it loose! Happy weekend! 

I don't know what it is about yoga that makes me sweat so much, but it is borderline embarassing. 
Scratch that. It's crazy embarassing, because it's not even when I'm in full flow or towards the end of the class like everyone else. It's like, I roll out my mat & I'm a gross sweaty mess! I even have a towel-like mat that I put over my real mat because I can't stay in one place if I don't have that. Just-a-slippin' & a-slidin' all over the place. Ugh. Gross. 
It's gross. I'm gross. & yesterday Mike W's (wonderful) class at the Westgate Black Swan location was no exception. What's the opposite of an exception?

Within the first 5 minutes probably, Mike W was all like "let's do crow before we're all to sweaty to get our legs up there, amirite??" 
HAHAHAHAHAHA- slip

Anyway, enough of that. 
It was a fantastic class. Mike W is great. 
The only thing that I do not like at Black Swan is that within the last year or so the teachers always want us to start the class by introducing ourselves to a stranger. This. Makes. Me. Uncomfortaaaaaable. Only once has that ever gone not totally awkward for me (it actually led to a nice discussion about queso). But, once in my first & ONLY sweaty yoga class (see above: oh, you're going to make this classroom hotter? How could this possibly be bad for me?) an exchange went like this: 

ME: hi, I'm Katy
Yogi 1: Hi, I'm Lindsay
Yogi 2: Hi, I'm Justin
Yogi 1: Hey, have you ever been to this class before?
Yogi 2: No, actually this is my first yoga class ever. 
ME (thinking I'm still part of the conversation): This is your first class ever?! 
Annoyed glares from Yogi 1 & Yogi 2. Obviously I was NOT still part of the conversation. 
Yogi 2: Uh... yeah. 
ME: Oh, okay. I.... mmmhmm 
goes back to picking nail polish off my toes. 

So, anyway. That happened. 
But I don't know if it's because I got there too late for it or if Mike W is just a goddamn rebel,but there was no meet & greet & all the awkward yogis in the room breathed a breath of relief (the first of many in the next hour to come). 

An interesting thing was that Mike W started the class with shavasana (which is always the last pose[?] of the class). For those that don't practice, shavasana is basically just laying there. I mean, I think you're supposed to be focusing on your breathing or setting an intention or sending out good vibes, but it's really just laying there.

I kind of don't care for shavasana. I get so antsy & start thinking of all the things that I could be doing instead  of just laying there. My yoga teacher friend, Kelli (whose blog you can read right here!) once told me that those who hate shavasana probably need it the most. But, Mike W said that we should try to find it in every pose. I had never really thought about that. I think that's a nice thought to think.
See, what he meant is-- that calm & serenity you find by just laying there & relaxing, you need to find a way to take that & try to find that calm within yourself when you're holding some super difficult pose for way longer than sanity would allow. 
And I love that. I think that rule could be transferred into so many elements of life. Stressed at work. Find Shavasana. Fighting with your love. Find Shavasana. Stuck in traffic?!?!? Find it. (I know nothing is more infuriating. Traffic maybe when you need it most)
I think this guys doing OK with it: 

oh, my good god. This picture makes me giggle so much. Get it? Do you get it? I'm sorry if you don't get it. Anyway, back to the class. 

It was so super hard you guys! Which is a good thing. I hadn't been to class in a while & I really needed it, but I was spent before the class was even kinda over. There were a lot of balancing poses which is OK. I need work on my balance, but it's so weird. I cannnnnnnnot balance on my right foot. Can't do it. Not for 5 seconds. 

There were also a lot of binds. Which I love. I love binds. 

Like this one: Now, I kind of stop at the first picture. But when balancing on my left leg & stretching my right leg I can usually straighten that leg for a solid 3 seconds before loosing my balance. So, that's fun. But oh boy. It feels awesome once you get it down. Even if you can't do the full fancy leg point. It's still great for your chest, legs & core. Also, getting your heart rate up! (I got these pictures here. I'm not sure exactly how I'm supposed to give props where props are due. But here are my props) 

So, needless to say, that today I am a damn sore mess. My shoulders, glutes & obliques are killing, but in a great way. 

Oh! But this morning I went to the gym to get my arm day out of the way. As you may remember, I hate hate hate hate front raises. So I've been pushing myself with them. I'm in the mind set that the more I do them the less I'll hate them eventually. So, anyway today after about rep 3 when I was just wanting to quit & cry because those dumbells are stupid & I hate them & I'm telling mom.. I paused & told myself to find my savasana here. Surely, there has to be some part of me that isn't rejecting this workout. Find that calm & apply it to this situation. 

I mean, it didn't really do anything, but maybe I just haven't channeled it yet. Ya know? I just gotta... tap into it? 

Anyway, I leave you with this dog who has MASTERED shavasana (which I have said so many times while writing this post that it no longer sounds like a word to me. Not that it's really an every day word anyway)

Happy Memorial day everyone! 
(Editor's note (is that right? Am I the editor?): I had to look up which holiday it is because I always think Memorial day is Labor day & Labor day is Labor day. Just tell me when to wear white) 
So, we started our day the way I've been waiting to start my Memorial day for months now. 
With the Bluth Family. 

I was in such an Arrested state  (see what I did there?) that I nearly had a vodka rocks & a piece of toast for breakfast... BUT! 
But, I didn't. 1) Because that actually sounds horrible & 2) Because I was trying my very first spin class today. 

Most mornings at 5:30 am my gym has their spin class. However, for the holiday today Gold's is having a very abbreviated schedule & the spin class was moved to 9 am. I've been wanting to try spin for ages & since 9am is not 5:30, I officially had no excuse not to go
This morning I was having a particularly nice hair-day & thought it would be adorable to put my hair in two little ponytails, put on a cute little blue t-shirt, some cute stud owl-shaped earrings & headed out to spin. 

DUUUUUUUUUDE. Dude! Dude. Seriously, dude. I mean. Yeah. That shit is intense. 
I saw roughly how many calories I would be burning in a spin class on My Fitness Pal & figured it'd be a really good cardio, but I didn't take the resistance training into account. My muscles... those ones on your legs (?) like above your knees- those are still burning! (quads? Are those quads? are these my quads right here? Can you see me pointing?)

My cute little blue t-shirt? Fuck that guy. When I was done with Jenn's 45 minute spin class it was a damn dark navy color. 
I honestly don't think I've ever sweat so much in my life! Luckily, I took a before & after (whatever. I just like taking selfies. I am the best photographer of me)

So, a little about the class. First off, when I got there I tried to adjust my bike & I just couldn't. I just couldn't figure it out. So... I was just going to do the whole damn class not quite reaching the peddles, but luckily I got some help.
The instructor, Jenn, had a great energy & came over to explain this contraption to me. She gave me a few pointers & kind of gave me a run down of the class structure. 
She totally could have saved herself some time by saying "Just do what I say & try not to pass out. Oh, yeah. I hope you live on the first floor. Oh, you don't? Ok, you're going to hate your life walking up your stairs later today. & just have fun with it! Stay hydrated!"

It was certainly challenging  but a great class. Something I particularly enjoyed was the playlist. I loved Jenn's selections. Firstly, there was one sequence called a "climbing" sequence. So, what this means is you start in first gear & you do that gear for 30 seconds & then you go to second gear & so on & so on until you're screaming "where the fuck is the top of this hill?!"
For that song she played Kanye's (Yes, we're on a first name basis) "No Church in the Wild" which I thought was a strange choice, but no. It was perfect. That steady, strong beat was perfect for this particular resistance, intense workout. 

Right? Isn't it perfect?
By the end of that song I checked my heart rate. My average heart rate through out the whole class was about 160 bpm (this highest I saw it was 175 & the lowest was about 140). So, an hour of that is pretty much killin' it, y'all. 

She also played my new favorite Robin Thicke song that I've mentioned before. I hadn't gotten a chance to work out to it yet, but I was correct. It's a booty-shakin' cardio inducing, fun song. 
 
Then, she really surprised me with this one song that I'm always hearing on Austin's go-to-indie-hipster station. I seriously cannot get enough of this song. It's sort of a slower song so I would have never thought to put it in a work out. It is a very, very sexy song. So maybe we're meant to peddle through the pain while imagining looking great naked? I don't know, but it worked for this sequence where we alternated between "peddling with the tempo" & then  "peddling like rabid dogs are chasing you through a field". Oh, let me look up the song. I don't even know who sings it. 

I was so grateful for the end of the class, but I can see myself going back.It looks like Jenn is the typical instructor on Mondays, so maybe I'll try to make this a Monday thing. 

....though 5:30 is so early y'all (I'm usually at the gym by 6am. there is a world of difference between 5:30 & 6)

Today is weigh in day! I don't know why I put an exclamation point there! I was not super stoked about it today. 
The last two days I have been perfect, but this weekend was not great. Sunday had been particularly hard. 

Also, as I mentioned yesterday, I'd been slacking on my workouts..
So, I was just A-Okay with my weigh in & measurements being EXACTLY the same as last week. 
So, in celebration & out of laziness, I just used last weeks scale picture. 
Just pretend where it says "Last Weigh In" that it says "Beginning" 

My toes are the same color & everything. 
Damnit, I really need to paint my toenails. What color should I do? Discuss.

And since my measurements are the same & everything- I look pretty much the same. 

So, I just had a little fun with my Picasa. This is me in the negative, but feeling pretty positive. I was in a great mood this morning for whatever reason. 

So, anyway.
Let's talk about something else.

Ever been to the awesome website  Muffin Topless? 
Oh, man. I love this site & I am seriously considering purchasing her Bikini Body plan. It's like $10 for a meal plan outline & 12 weeks workout plan. 
Yes, I'm sure that I could come up with a plan along these lines on my own, but I feel much more confident in someone else doing this for me. 

Anyway, I'm really into this site right now & I'm planning to incorporate some of her tips & workouts into my life. For example, Savannah suggest starting with setting easy goals like taking a multi-vitamin every morning or drinking a gallon of water a day.
Yeah, I said a gallon. So I gave that a try. If my calculations are correct ( & by calculations, I mean typing "how many cups are in a gallon" into Google) a gallon is 16 cups
Daaaaamn, y'all. 16 cups is a lot of fucking water to consume in one day. I mean, does one's bladder eventually adapt to that, or is it just perpetual bathroom all day everyday for the rest of your gallon-a-day-life?
But, I must say just by following her basic meal plan lay out & taking a vitamin & peeing all the damn time-- I do feel healthier & can certainly feel my energy levels rising!

Oh, speaking of getting your energy up, I found a new boogie-inducing song!

Robin Thicke has been around since forever & I always, always forget about him.
This song is fun. Isn't it fun? I think it's fun.

Ok, so I will keep you posted in my Muffin Topless related decision. In the mean time, read that blog. It's great & she's super Bopo (that's twitter for body positive). Until next time, I'm going to leave you with some more Amanda Bynes because it's a super slow day at work & she's such an amazing waste of time-- I mean a way to waste your time... actually, no. Both ways work.

                            HAPPY FRIDAY Y'ALL!

OH MY GOD! Here's a video of her getting in her spazzy-drug induced cardio! You know what... that actually looks like a lot of fun.

she might actually be on to something there...